This is an excerpt from a book that I am currently reading. It is encouraging me with things that I’ve been thinking about and attempting to do with my children already, but yet it is giving me much more to think about. I thought I would share it with you and let it challenge you alongside me.
“We make sure our children have perfect teeth. We scrape to save for the orthodontist or refinance the house to pay for braces. It’s expensive and requires dozens of visits over a period of years, but the result is the perfect smile.
I submit that the perfect smile is the icon for today’s child. I’m not against orthodontists or good dental care, just proposing perfect teeth as a symbol of all our efforts as parents. He’s not born with it, but through effort, expense and sacrifice, he’s gonna have the perfect smile. It’s costly, demands time, is repetitive and uncomfortable, and our kids complain about it, but the end result is a gleaming, symmetrical smile, worthy of a magazine cover.
We are raising a generation with perfect teeth and twisted hearts. Because of our investment, they have nice teeth, but their hearts are warped. They haven’t learned compassion, empathy and initiative. They haven’t developed personal convictions and moral standards. They feel okay about themselves because they have been told that they are “good”, but deep down inside they wonder, Am I really good? Do I have what it takes to make it? Does life require more of me than being nice?
In a culture that opposes many biblical commitments, being nice will not equip our children to be effective. Being nice will not help them advance the kingdom of God with their convictions, behavior and influence. Being nice won’t help them stand apart.
Instead of socializing our children into the predominant norms of our society, we need to strategically train them to engage and challenge these norms and views. We need to model for them the values that we hold dear and we need to teach them qualities and skills that will make a difference in their lives and in the lives of others. In a word, we need to disciple our children.”
From “The Danger of Raising Nice Kids” by Timothy Smith
I don’t know about you, but I have a goal of raising leaders of the next generation. I do not want them to blend in. I want them to stand out because they are a light to a dark generation. I don’t want to just focus on the exterior of my children. I want to make sure that I fill in the “meaty” interior stuff for them so that they know how to go against the flow and think for themselves. I don’t want them to just be “nice”, but also to have strength of character. I’ve got work to do…
that last paragraph is what I want when I have kids. I know the times will probably change, but that’s the attitude I want to have for my children.
Loved the quote! I’ve been trying to formulate, for a long time now, and write out, why we homeschool, our family goals and mission. I ask Rod for ideas, and always have all kinds of things running through my head. SO I always love reading/finding something that says what I’ve been thinking!
Anna